The Absorbability of Self

So I sat there and watch the people that surrounded me, and in a moment, I was disgusted. I could not get over how these “Christians” were so self-absorbed and ignorant of the reality of life that surrounded them. If it didn’t impact their life at this very moment, they didn’t seem to care. This was Sunday. But Tuesday I was over my disgusted feeling, but not because I had prayed and expunged it. So when Deur suggested that the team walk in amongst the neighborhood and pray, I was all for it, I felt like my heart was in a good place, so ahead I went. As I walked, I noticed how different the house were, how they each had their own personality and reflected how they could almost reflect the people that live inside of it. Some looked like homes, while others mere houses.
I came upon this one house that had been recently TP’ed. Toilet paper remnants spread all over their lawn and dangling from the tree. I immediately felt the Spirit say “what’s stopping you from cleaning up this mess?” Nothing I thought, but why don’t I. Why don’t I show up with a rake, or even ask if they have one so I can rake up the mess. What’s stopping me from knocking on their door as asking them “how can I serve you?” It’s not that I’m afraid of being rejected or mocked (Hello I’m French, it happens daily), and it’s not that I don’t have time or am injured. I really have no reason, so why don’t I. Then it all came flooding back. Sunday I was frustrated with the self absorbed people that we around me, but I was one of them. Wow what a kick to the tender spot. Here I was, not against serving or getting in the community, but every time an opportunity arose, I was always shying away from it, not for any reason, I didn’t even have an excuse, I just didn’t do it, because I didn’t want to.
The ultimate depth of self absorbability is when you can sit and say I don’t want to, without reason or excuse. Pure selfish neglect of action. If my heart is so tuned into the heart of Christ, then I will at every opportunity put myself aside for the sake of others. The self comes after all else is done. Jesus said “ I must be about my father’s business”, and if I am living my life so as to reflect the work of transformation into Christ in my life, than should that reflect the life of Christ and his fervor for being about the father’s business.
Absorbability of self… we all have an amount of absorbability left, where we rule, we control, and God has no say. I want it to be purge and be not.
Roach out.

Love 101

C. Hassel Bullock wrote that "the path to the profound is often paved with the obvious." So it got me to thinking...about love. See recently, there’s been much talk about love, especially in circle of which I am a part of. So I've been wondering the depth of love, mire specifically, the depth with which we love and the depth we are capable of as Children of God. The more and more I thought about it the more complex and deep concept it seemed. But then I thought, if it’s something we are all called to do and be, to love our neighbor (that means everyone), then it must be something we can grasp and apply to our lives.
Side note: If we live in step with God, then the characteristics and attributes that he desires us to have and live in, basically the fruit of the Spirit, begin to manifest themselves naturally. Like if you water a plant, then it grows, so if we feed off of our time with God, then we grow and begin to live out his heart.
Back to the thought. So if we’re spending time with God, and focusing our worship on him, then we love without knowing it. We begin to give people the benefit of the doubt, we stop short of criticizing (even not thinking critically at all), we began to birth a desire to help and serve people, we actually pray for people instead of just saying “I’ll keep you in prayer.” We begin to love like Jesus loves. Cool eh?
So live with Christ, and love like him. Obvious, but profound.
Roach out.

Humbled in the Presence of Sovereignty

So I got up this morning with great plans. Nothing spectacular. I have a tee time with Aaron Becker, (a Cession Student and avid golfer) to play 18. We’ve been talking trash to each other for about two months over who would win a face to face challenge, so today was the day. Before I reveal the score I want to make sure I get my excuses and complaints in. (Deep breath) Ok, so it was windy, and the sun was in my eyes, plus it was early, and I didn’t get to warm up at the range, plus these guys were behind us and we felt pressured, plus the greens weren’t in great shape…(gasp). Ok, now that that is out of the way we can be honest. Becker shot a 95…that’s 25 over par…not good…but even worse was my 110…I haven’t shot that bad since I first started. It was awful, but still a good time. We had fun. We have short talks, just casual stuff, some about the Lord, some about life.
Then the day progressed to hanging with Jeff Johnson jr. We didn’t know what to do, so he asked if I’d give him some golf lessons. So we headed to the driving range (due to the funds provided by the 1st national bank of dad). Jeff did well, he’s a natural, just a few things to tweak. We got back to the house for some hang out time……then it happened….I was faced with the Sovereignty of the Most High.
There are times when I “feel” God, I sense his presence and there is a perspectives being set. He is God and I am not. And there are times that I have a deep awareness that he is ever present and I am humble by his acts, both past and present, and stand in wonder of a God who lives in spite of our sin. But oft time, I lack the awareness that he is constantly active in my life. Now I know he’s got a plan and he’s working everything for my good because I love him. But I don’t always see the tangible acts that remind me that he’s involved in every detail, constantly providing examples of his love. So today, I was hit with that 1 ton anvil that so often impacted Wild E. Coyote. As I returned from the driving range, I was told a story, of one man who sensed God asking him to give another man a $100. No reason, just to do it. And then later the man who was the recipient, who at first didn’t understand the gesture, needed that money to pay for an unexpected incurred bill. (Good story I thought). Then the story teller told me how earlier when we had talked and I left with Jeff to go hit some balls, he felt that same sense to give me something. He felt compelled to pay for the cost of the round I played this morning with Becker. He told me what the Lord was telling him, why I needed this money and why God was blessing me.
I stood there in complete awe. Not at the man, but at the God who the man served. I was humbled because I was in the presence of the Sovereign, lived out in the life of a human, a man of God who desired nothing but to be obedient to his first love, Jesus.
In the presence of Sovereignty.
Here's the lesson. God is constantly doing stuff like that to me, but I’m not always seeing it, I’m not always looking for it, but it’s there. God never ceases to display his love for me, it’s in the sunset, the morning dew, the evening fog, the crash of thunder and the rhythm of the rain. It’s in my wife’s smile and in the squawk of seagulls. It’s everywhere. I just need to see it.
“Open the eyes of my heart Lord, I want to see you.”
Roach out.